Should parents take children to church or just allow them to make the decision to attend when they are older?

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Question: Should parents take children to church or just allow them to make the decision to attend when they are older?

Answer: Attention, parents! The Bible warns that God holds parents fully accountable for their children’s spiritual instruction and guidance. For many families, most of this happens at church. Parents who neglect this do so at their own peril. Not only will God deal with parental disobedience in this area, but parents will suffer terribly as their children mature, as they realize that their own bad choices caused much suffering and spiritual death for their dear loved ones. If you don’t teach your children to love and follow Jesus, the world will teach them not to. God directed Moses to write in Deuteronomy: 

“But watch out! Be careful never to forget what you yourself have seen. Do not let these memories escape from your mind as long as you live! And be sure to pass them on to your children and grandchildren. Never forget the day when you stood before the Lord your God at Mount Sinai, where God told me, Summon the people before me, and I will personally instruct them. Then they will learn to fear me as long as they live, and they will teach their children to fear me also.” Deuteronomy 4:9-10

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. Take to heart these words that I give you today. Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you’re at home or away, when you lie down or get up. Write them down, and tie them around your wrist, and wear them as headbands as a reminder. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.” Deuteronomy 6:5-9

“For I will speak to you in a parable. I will teach you hidden lessons from our past— stories we have heard and known, stories our ancestors handed down to us. We will not hide these truths from our children; we will tell the next generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord, about his power and his mighty wonders.” Psalm 78:2-4 

Biblical instruction is vital so that young people, from childhood, will come to understand how:

  • God loves them.
  • He created people to have good fellowship with them.
  • He planned for everything they would need. 
  • He has an exciting future for them in heaven!

God’s words for living are not the opinions of men but are designed by Him to benefit men, women, and children so they will get to know Him as their loving, heavenly Father. In this increasingly dangerous and tumultuous world, children will certainly need the full benefits of God’s guidance and His peace through the hard times ahead in their lives. 

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose hope is the LORD. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” Jeremiah 17:7-8

Jesus said, “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

Jesus said that tribulation, or the intense distress caused by problems, will come to everyone – not IF problems come but WHEN they arrive!  We know that troubles come into our lives, even beginning in childhood. We supply our children with everything we think they’ll need, from food and clothing to education and job skills. Why not build, from their infancy, the foundation of the knowledge of the love of Jesus for them? They will certainly need it and parents’ instructions on how to run to Him for help as the hurricane winds of life blow. Children are headed into storms in the downwardly spiraling world in which we live. To survive and thrive, they must learn to pray and read the Bible, God’s life guidebook. Parents need this, too, and can model for their loved ones how to turn to God and ask for help! How else can dads and moms teach children the truths of God unless they themselves have experienced them? Our own stories we share with others of God’s faithfulness have enormous impact on others of all ages. That’s an important reason God wants us to meet together with other believers regularly, for encouragement and support.

Have you heard the expression, “the family that prays together stays together”?  

Prayer is a tie God uses to bind people closer to one another, and so does the reading of God’s word and discussing it.  By taking your children to church, you establish and preserve a happy memory for children of how to be responsible Christian parents. The community of faith into which parents immerse their children provides not only relationships with other kids who are learning about God but also friendships among  parents who are seeking God’s wisdom and direction. A great deal of support is shared when families come together to learn and worship. This can be especially helpful for single parents who seek additional Christian role models for their children. Like-minded adults who are attending church regularly can reinforce Biblical advice children hear from their own parents. 

Talk with your Father in heaven and ask Him for guidance on this issue. He will lead you to just the right church if you don’t yet attend one. You can pray something like this:

Dear God, 

I feel your urging to take my family to church, and I ask for your perfect guidance. I need you to lead me to just the right place to worship you and learn what you intend for us to understand about you from the Bible. Help me to be the leader you meant for me to be so my family members and I will join you in heaven when we die. I want to do all I can to make sure we go to heaven and not hell!  You know my intense love for my family, but it can’t compare to the even greater love the Bible shows you have for us. Please speak to the hearts of my spouse and children so they will be ready and willing to grow closer to you spiritually. Point out which churches you might want us to visit, and then remind us to pray as a family about our selection. As the Bible tells me to do, I am putting my total trust in you. Amen.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”  Proverbs 3:5-6

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His arrival could be at any moment. So, we should be immediately and seriously thinking about it! The Bible tells us the “eyes of the Lord are always upon us...” and is mentioned several times (Psalm 34.15, Deuteronomy 11:12, Proverbs 15:3.) In the Proverbs reference, the Holy Spirit inspired King Solomon to pen that the Lord sees all “in every place, beholding the evil and the good.” Sadly, Christians – yes, those who claim to follow Jesus – are sometimes the worst offenders of participating in evil. Why rank them as worse? Because THEY KNOW better! Jesus taught: “…but the one who does not know any better and does things deserving punishment, he will receive light blows. 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He who does good is of God, but he who does evil has not seen God.” 3 John 1:11 God admonishes us to be holy, as He is, which means being aligned with Him, to act differently from the majority of people in the world, who live in spiritual darkness. Remember, the Bible shows us examples of how going along with the majority is usually wrong and leads to disaster. “Find out what pleases the Lord. And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness but, rather, expose them.” Ephesians 5:10-11 Everyone knows that to murder, steal, and commit adultery are wrong. Other sins may seem less obvious. Do you curse or laugh at a dirty joke? Do you gossip or lie so others won’t know you’ve made a mistake? What about accepting or taking part in what God calls evil? Christians should be on guard against taking lightly any events that promote the darkness represented by images of Satan, demons, witches, and more. 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